Did you ever hear about the Tibetan monks who were continually trying to determine just exactly what the function of the navel was?
Well, it appears that they had spent so much time contemplating their navels that they felt it beholden on them to elevate it to a position of importance among the body's members. But, whilst constructing a tome devoted to the wonders of this small, unregarded organ (?), they discovered that they didn't really know what it was for. (Except, of course, contemplating)
The head lama immediately called a contemplation conference and lead all of his devoted followers off to the top of a mountain where they were to contemplate the aforementioned anatomical anomaly until someone could determine what it was for. Well, let me tell you, this wasn't what you could call easy! For days they sat on top of the mountain contemplating their navels and searching their inner spaces for a function other than contemplation. Finally, after three of the monks had died of starvation and the rest where close to it, the chief monk stood to his feet and shouted (very hoarsely), "I've got it!"
Well, needless to say, the company of monks was overjoyed to hear this and immediately demanded to know the answer. "I am sorry to tell you this," he began, "but we have been misled. The navel serves absolutely no purpose and as such is not even worthy of contemplation." With this earth shattering statement he bounded down the mountain, back towards the monastery, leaving his startled underlings alone at the top. Before these baffled clergymen could convince their legs to work, however, he was back, carrying several screwdrivers. "Here," he said, "take these, pass them around and remove the offending oddity." With that he passed the screwdrivers around, sat down, inserted the blade into his navel and began to unscrew it, strangely enough, in a clockwise direction.
You might well be able to imagine the shock and surprise the sprang to the faces of the assembled brothers when their potentate was able to remove his navel, without apparent misfortune. Soon each of the monks held his own navel in his hand, noticing rather parenthetically that it was an awful lot easier to contemplate something you could hold in your hand than something that was attached to your stomach.
"And now by friends," their spiritual leader said, "we must get rid of these things so that we never again are troubled by them. Let us take them and throw them over the side of the mountain. Well, they all stood up, planning to walk to a nearby cliff and guess what happened?"
Their bums fell off.
Author unknown.
